When I speak - Nobody Listens!

Rodney Dangerfield made a career of getting “no respect”. He died as the most famous non-person ever. How many times have you been Rodney in reality? I hate to admit the number of times that I have honestly felt ignored or basically just tolerated. Have you ever been the one in a group conversation whose comments always seemed to be in the way of those who really had something to say? It used to happen to me all the time. I have often felt that my input was nothing more than an after thought in some discussions. There is a reason for that I suppose. Some of it has to do with confidence. Some of the slight we receive from others might be justified but there just has to be some moment in time where each and every one of us has a real chance to be heard.

Men are accused of this all the time by their wives. I have to admit that I plead guilty. I am still not totally able to comprehend why a woman does not want you to fix her problem. She just wants you to patiently listen while she explains it all to you. The solution is not necessary. My wife seems very relieved after I listen to her. She has no other expectation. That’s fine for her but I am fit to be tied to be without a solution after hearing all the details of some apparent injustice.

There is a rationale behind the woman’s need to be heard. The need for someone to listen to us is universal. Listening is all about love. Listening has nothing to do with me. It has everything to do with others. Even if I fix somebody’s problem, they will find another one. The problems do not go away. A quick fix is no solution for someone who wants to be heard. In fact, my solution may not work anyway because I haven’t listened in the first place.

The best thing about true friendship is our sincere desire to be there for each other. You want to help your friend. You are a dumping ground for all that ails him and he appreciates it and you don’t mind. He does the same for you. Jesus spoke these words, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” Listening is a part of the laying down. The whole world is full of people who need to be heard when they speak. The therapy for our own life is almost always found when we forget about ourselves and concentrate on others. I wonder what the world would be like if we just started listening. I know of only one negative. It would have ruined the career of Rodney Dangerfield.