Back To Business

There were some folks who tried to hang in there and congregate on Sundays at Northfold. I would occasionally drop in and see the small fledgling group of about 25-30 people. It was kind of sad but it also meant that it was time for change. I had great aspirations for ministry but I really started to wonder about my particular calling after what had happened the past few years. In hindsight, I was making decisions with very little understanding of their impact which is symptomatic of being young and inexperienced. The joy of Lord that strengthened me throughout my initial experience in Follansbee had been replaced by doubt and uncertainty. I just wasn't sure how I fit into the church scene. I hopped around the community and visited some local churches. I could see that the more organized they were, the more lifeless they appeared to me. They were safe havens that allowed each member to fulfill what appeared to be a dutiful christian life style but I could not sense any passion for Jesus.

I had a family and I had to support them. I decided to invest my time in the insurance business and lay low on the church scene. I would often visit my friends in West Virginia and too often I would openly confess my regret for ever leaving Follansbee. To this day, I wonder about that decision. I've learned now that life is really a decsion making process and those decisions shape and form the direction that we go. This decision making is best described in the Bible as sowing and reaping. That's why history is very important to all of us. We can learn from it.

I lived with a lingering in my heart that God probably had something else in store for me and that my past few years were nothing more than a training ground for my actual call. I decided not to intiate spiritual things with others but just let them happen. I had no idea what to do at this point and so I became the supreme insurance professional. I ask the Lord to help me find success in the insurance business. The Lord spoke to me about faithfulness and He said that His basis for promotion would not be because of my talent but that it would come from committment and faithfulness. This was my next lesson to be learned from the Lord. I call it "The Joseph Principle". Wherever Joseph found himself he became the exemplary model of excellence and faithfulness and Joseph found himself in some loathful situations. I didn't like where I was but I needed to learn committment. The Lord had spoken.

Next up.....

The Interview

Religion and Politics

I can remember as a youngster growing up with a great deal of honor and pride for the President of the United States. My first president was Dwight D Eisenhauer. I can't remember much about him. I knew that he was an ex-military man. Of course I remember Nixon and Kennedy. There has been a disdain for both religion and politics in our country for as long as I can remember and these two segments of our society are what hold it together. Religion and politics are full of opinions and so many want to steer clear of any thing that demands a choice. In other words, just leave me a lone and let me do my own thing. Many of us are completely unaware that it is a minority of Americans that guide the politics and religion that form and shape our lives both good and bad. There are a lot of non-voters and there are a lot of non-churched Americans that are indifferent to the Political and Religious institutions. Some folks have always been indifferent and a new group of defectors has arisen that were once committed to those institutions that are now burnt out and disillusioned by the ineffectiveness of both.



I know that most of the conservatives would bet their money that Jesus is a republican and the Liberals think that Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed and many more are joint heirs in the Democratic party. The once popular melting pot of society is fast becoming a boiling pot because more and more of the issues are starting to divide people rather than unify. You can see it in poltics and religion. It seems like we are divided right down the middle. We call that checks and balances. I call it a divide that is so deep that we cannot get anything done. There is very little bipartisan politics and religion is anything but eccumenical. Yep, we're all happy doing our own thing. That's the price of freedom. God and America have both given us complete freedom to choose and what have we done with those choices. What a responsibilty.

It's Over

Reviewing your history after 35 years allows you to view past events with more objectivity. You are able to evaluate those moments without the emotion and drama that existed at the time. I have to admit though that I still have a tiny bit of emotion lingering in my heart when I think back on these things. Northfold was about to end. I could see it coming at the time but I knew that there was very little that I could do about it. The things that held us together were no longer there. The trust was gone. There were too many questions. People just weren't sure anymore. Rumors and backbiting began to surface. Shepherding was a bust. You could sense that no one wanted to see Northfold die yet there were under currents of rebellion and displeasure that would feed back into those who were trying to overcome what was happening.

This was my second encounter with organized church. Northfold was a pioneering church. Pioneers often get their heads cut off so that others can inherit the land. That's exactly what happened. We were trying things for the first time and lessons were learned for sure. I understand it now but back then I began to wonder about church in general. My initial experiences with church were very disappointing. My days in Follansbee seemed like a distant memory. I moved to Pittsburgh because I thought that I could learn something while growing with a community of believers. I did learn a lot but I was still very young and as a result of all of this I became very skeptical of organized church. I was part of the leadership and I can honestly say that none of us in the eldership expected this to happen. Pastor Ron's heart was broken over this whole episode. The enemy had a field day with our ignorance and inexperience.

We were advancing the kingdom at the beginning. That made us a target for the enemy. We wrestle not with flesh and blood but with evil principalities and powers for sure. Northfold wasn't playing the church game. We weren't a safe haven of "religious" activity. We were leading people to Christ and operating in the power of the Spirit. We were an easy mark for criticism for those institutions who chose to live the christian life in the easy chair and we soon became the enemy's primary foe in the North Hills.

I can understand it all now. I find the whole experience to my gain. I learned things that could never have been learned playing church somewhere. I get it now but back then I was disillusioned. I threw in the towel. Northfold was gone.

Next up......

Back To Business

Little Things

When I was a manager at Allstate insurance, I used to tell my guys that a big shot was nothing more than a little shot that kept on shootin'. It's amazing what can occur if we do all the little things that make a big thing happen. There's not enough luck to make us all a success. Success is a big thing in America. We are driven by success and the thoughts of achievement. I firmly believe that the desire for success and achievement is all because our Lord created us with this passion. I love reading in Genesis how God would compliment His own work. He would create something and then say "It is Good". How cool is that? It wouldn't be that cool if it was a "Big Bang" though. There would be no intricacy in all that He did. It would be like a fast food creation and the Lord isn't at all like that. The Lord is very detailed and the little things are important to Him. Look at the detailed instruction that Noah had to follow to build the ark. The Tabernacle is another example of the Lord's interest in detail.

The reason that I am bringing this to your attention is that I am sensing that the Holy Spirit has been nudging me down deep inside about "little things". Little things that I have ignored that make life better. Serving and giving myself to the little things that my wife and family need are key to having a successful family. If you think about "Big Things" and wish that they would happen they probably won't until the little things are done first.

Little things seem insignificant at the time but the accumulated affect of doing them is huge. I've always been a guy with big ideas but often never reached the goal because I wasn't willing to do the day by day menial tasks that make it all happen. God is a God of little things. He sees every hair on our head. His creation is enormous but without His detail it would be bland and shallow.

If you are struggling to accomplish something right now, take a look at the little things that you are doing and remember Davey Buhl's proverb: "A big shot is nothing more than a little shot that kept on shootin". Actually, forget that and study the scriptures about faithfulness.

To Know Him is To Love Him

To Know Him is to Love Him is an old 50's song that kind of jumped out at me this morning. It's a great old song and kind of speaks to the heart of all of us. We all down deep inside want to know who created us as well as the world that we live in. We wonder what He is really like. We hear about him from others all the time. Preachers, teachers, evangelists always seem to portray God as something less than personal. We always hear about God in the context of what is right and what is wrong as if God wasn't interested in anything else other than our moral conduct.

Somehow we have missed the real person of the Lord. We are so caught up in translating thoughts and ideas that we miss His person. I have noticed a huge void over the years in this regard. Very few people sound like they know Him. It's kind of a mystery to me. I have fallen into the same trap myself. I have spent way to much time trying to figure things out and far too little time getting to know Him. Why do we do that? Something tells me that we don't believe that we will find Him any way. Something tells me that we are unsure about how and if He will respond to us if we seek Him out and so we ignore Him completely.

Could you imagine what would happen if we took the time that we spent attending meetings, church services, home groups, analyzing scripture, and all the other religious duties that we perform and actually spent that time seeking Him. Did you ever think that maybe we lack real faith at times because we have lost contact with Him. I'm speaking for all of us here who claim to be a christian. I rarely talk to a brother or sister in Christ anymore that have shared about their intimacy with God. I remember the days when my brothers and sisters in Christ would share with me about their time with Jesus. It would build my faith and would motivate me to get closer to Him.

Brothers and Sisters, I have concluded that many of us sorely miss our Lord and that we have wandered so far away that there is very little to hold our faith together. He is the author and finisher of our faith and by that I mean His person. To know Him is to Love Him. The opposite of not knowing Him is true as well. If we lose Him in the midst of all that we are doing we will find our heart not caring anymore and we will just be going through the motions.

Lord, Help us. We need you more than ever. Help those of us wandering to find you again.

Lord, help us to sense Psalm 23 down deep in our heart that you are our shepherd and we shall not want.

Culture Centered or Christ Centered

I have to admit that we are in a bit of a dilemma here in America. Much of the world views the American life style with envy and disdain. They see us as rich and arrogant and yet we are usually the world's Fema for disaster relief. We are a rich nation and we try to be gracious with what we have but the perception is still there. We have a lot of stuff. We are busy with our stuff. Even the most modest in social economic status is burdened with too much stuff. We are driven by economics in our life style. Our welfare recipients have it so much better than the rest of the poor around the world.

Everyone seems to enjoy getting on the bandwagon to ridicule America but most would love to live here. It's hard for the world to love the American. How does God love the American? Does He view us as an arrogant, pompous people just out for ourselves. I would really love to know how and why God loves us because that's the kind of heart that I want to have for my fellow American. There is a church in the book of Revelations 3 called Laodicea that God admonishes because of their pride in their wealth but He does give them a way out of their dilemma.

To the Church in Laodicea "To the angel of the church in Laodicea write: These are the words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the ruler of God's creation. I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth. You say, 'I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.' But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see. Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. To him who overcomes, I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I overcame and sat down with my Father on his throne. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches."

As I read this scripture I do notice some very interesting points of interest.

1. Wealth may be the cause of the "Luke Warm" status of so many Christians in this country.
2. We need new spiritual apparel to cover our embarrassing nakedness
3. We need salve for our eyes so that we can see what's really going on
4. He loves us! That's why he rebukes us!

The Lord is angry at anything that separates us from Him. He isn't anymore angry at us because we are wealthy. He knows our dilemma. We don't. We are blinded by our culture many times and cannot see the Lord. He wants us to repent from this and get some new clothes and a new pair of spiritual glasses. Once we get fitted in our new digs then we can overcome the American lifestyle with a new life style as bond servants to our King. We can then live in our culture with influence and adjust our priorities. Until then we will surely be Culture centered and not Christ centered. We cannot do this alone. We need each other. A grass roots effort for this kind of change could actually unify Christians in America and help our country as well.

Discipleship-Part II

In the natural, a sheep knows it's shepherds voice. The shepherding movement kind of missed that when they began to assign people to under-shepherds. The congregation at Northfold was very understanding for the most part. They trusted the leadership and were willing to give it a go. At first, there was little anxiety. I really think that the majority of our folks were willing to embrace the concept but there still seemed to be some doubt in every ones mind. Pastor Ron was the pastor. They knew his voice. I can't imagine how some of the folks felt about being pastored by someone else. We really tried to manage this transition the right way. I was assigned a lot of young people. It made sense since I was in my late 20's. At first it seemed awkward because the grouping of the people was unnatural and so it was difficult for folks to embrace the new guy as their pastor.

The upper level leadership in the shepherding movement was trying to do the same thing. Prominent Pastors in the Pittsburgh area were submitting themselves to one another in an effort to maintain accountability just like the flocks that they pastored. A great deal of teaching began to arise that supported the whole concept of shepherding. It seemed to take preeminence over other teaching. I saw the imbalance begin when the leadership began to teach about honoring those that were over you in authority. This is when little things began to happen like carrying your pastors bag for him. Dishonoring your pastor was not a good thing. What happened? The same thing that always happens. We began to take ourselves too seriously. The intentions were good but we somehow drifted from the Lord and fell into the trap of building an authoritarian empire.

It weakened relationships at Northfold because the natural flow of life was interrupted by the implementation of this concept. There was a stirring and a number of prophecies that began to surface. There was a small but powerful group of women in the church that began to question everything that we were doing. All of the sudden, a once very strong and secure family of believers became very fragmented and fragile. I couldn't believe what was happening. I began to question my move to Pittsburgh.

Next up.....

It's Over...

Discipleship-Part I

I experienced a true move of God in the 1970's called the Charismatic movement. It was a wonderful ecumenical movement powered by the Holy Spirit. Duquense University hosted several Charismatic conferences during that time and the euphoria around the conference was truly exciting and powerful. Catholics, Presbyterians, Methodists, Episcopals, and many more participated in the conference. There were no barriers. We were one. The body of Christ was uniting around the Lord. It was a miraculous occurrence. In hindsight, I can honestly say that this was clearly a movement initiated by the Lord himself. The movement intensified the commitment that we needed for one another along with the recognition that we were not each others enemy and that there was another sinister power out to divide us.

Along with this heart warming movement came the spawning of new independent fellowships all over the land. Northfold was just one of many new independent pioneering churches of the 70's. Much of this happened because some of the denominational hierarchy rejected the movement and so many folks left the denomination to start their own church. This created a rather large network of churches that were governed sovereignly from within without any accountability other than their own local leadership. In retrospect, I believe that this spawned a movement called "shepherding" or discipleship. The premise behind the shepherding movement was good and had a lot of merit supported by the scripture.

The shepherding movement really tried to address some deficiencies that existed amongst the independent churches. The whole idea that each man should be under authority was the leading edge of the movement. The intentions were noble and the leadership of this movement was trying to prevent the "Lone Ranger" mentality that can lead to deception and even corruption in church leadership. The sheperding movement really began to address the role of the senior pastor and his solo act as a shepherd. How can one man pastor 500 people? This was the type of question being raised by this movement. It was a good question and there was an honest desire to develop a network of leadership that were all under authority and to divide the congregations accordingly and assign smaller groups to under-shepherds appointed by the senior pastor. The idea of Paul-Timothy relationships was the biblical premise for mentoring and expanding the leadership for the purposes of properly caring for the flock.

The concept was noble. The intentions were noble. The implementation was a disaster.

Up Next......

Discipleship-Part II

Where is the USA in the Bible?

I've asked a few learned folks this same question and nobody seems to have an explanation but I find it odd that the historically world renowned United States of America would not be included somewhere in the Bible. It puzzles me a bit and also makes me wonder. If any of you out there have any insight, I would like to hear about it. It may be an insignificant question and there may be no real relevance to why it is not mentioned in the scriptures. It just gives me an unsettling kind of feeling about the future of our country. I have no insight into what might happen to the USA in the future. We have been quite resilient as a nation. We have been able to endure many trials as a nation because the fabric of our Judeo-Christian heritage has sustained us and we have been able to survive because our government has always made us secure and given us hope.

I did a study on authority and faith once based on Matthew 8's great story about the centurion that approached Jesus for help. Jesus gave the centurion a wonderful affirmation. The centurion understood authority and therefore he understood that Jesus was not operating purely on his own but that He was authorized to do what he was doing by some higher power. Jesus praised the centurion and even said that he had not seen such great faith in any man in all of Israel. That made me begin to see the link between authority and faith. I began to see this link on a national level as well. Nations with weak authority(often because of corruption) do not give their people much faith or hope.

This seems to be a subject that needs to be researched and taught about more. If Jesus was astounded at the centurions understanding of authority and faith then I am sold on the premise that without understanding authority our faith is insecure and at best just wishful thinking. What does this have to do with the USA not being in the Bible? I'm not sure but I am pretty certain that the United States must continue to have a strong moral authority in order to survive. Let's pray that we continue to do so.

I'm Accused......

We used to sing a little chorus back in the late 70's and the first verse had these words; "Let's forget about ourselves and concentrate on Him and worship Him." It kind of made you dial down and drop your guard and minimize your world so that you could enter into a blissful state of worship. When I think of that chorus I can also envison the opposite affect that occurs when we fail to forget about ourselves and take ourselves way too seriously. I remember my days in West Virginia as days that I really had very very little self-awareness. I was starting to get that self awareness back as I struggled to fit into this new arena of ministry at our church at Northfold. One Sunday morning at Northfold it became evident that I needed God's grace and Love to return to my heart.

After almost every service folks would come forward for prayer or spend some time in conversation with one of the elders or pastors. One Sunday morning I was approached by a lady and her young son. She looked at me and said, "Pastor Buhl", which felt kind of odd to me because no one in the church ever called me pastor. Immediately I felt a formality in this conversation that I wasn't at all used to but I moved on and replied, "Yes Maam, Can I help you?" She then ask me a very pointed question. She said to me, "What do you do all week as a full time minister? I proceeded cautiously by divulging a little bit about my weekly routine. I finally posed the question, "Why do you Ask?" She began to elevate her voice and tone and I could sense that she was angry about something. She had her twelve year old son beside her and apparently was not very happy with the fact that we did not have a Sunday School class for his age group during the service. It sounded to me like her son was ruining her Sunday morning worship and that she would have liked to have been alone so that she could get more out of the service. She accused me and Pastor Ron of not making good use of our time as full time ministers and that if we were on the ball that this problem that she was having would have never occurred.

I don't know why I reacted this way but I turned a brush fire into a towering inferno. I told the lady that Sunday school was a man made supplement to teach children about God and that the real responsibility belong to the parents. I told her that while I empathized with her dilemma I didn't think that the accusation was warranted. That set her off even more and she left the church in a major huff. I didn't handle it very well at all and was somewhat chastized at our elders meeting. Deep down inside I felt that I was right but I also knew that being right isn't always important if our rightness cannot edify others. I certainly didn't look to edify this lady. I thought that she needed knocked down a bit.

This was my first experience with the possible "politics" that can go on in organized church. My fellow elders backed me but at the same time I had the funny feeling that no one wanted to upset the apple cart. I began to feel like I had to temper my ways and be careful not to offend folks. This was not my modus operandi in West Virgina. I was upsetting people all the time about things and when they would get angry I would just love them and forgive them in my heart because I didn't think that they were really angry at me. I thought that they were angry because they didn't have what I had as yet. They didn't know Jesus and my life in Christ presented a problem to them. It was great to be opposed by so many and yet have no anger or bitterness toward them. The Lord was able to reach many of them because of my dogged persistance.

Church life was different. It inhibited me. I didn't feel like I could be myself anymore. I loved all the people and was very devoted to Pastor Ron but I started losing my zeal for the Lord. I started to stay home with the kids more and watch sports. The Steelers were winning all those Super Bowls back then and I started to get caught up in all the Black and Gold euphoria.

Next up.....

Discipleship

The Value of My Story..

I would hope that all of you that read my blog would read "My Story". It is a unique story because it is a story about an unchurched young man divinely swept away by the power of the Holy Spirit into the arms of God who then tries to make sense of American church life for the next 30+ years. I have concluded that my journey and my story is to be told so that others can see the discoveries that I made along the way.

My journey and history are deeply riveted in my heart and I have a sense of purpose in sharing with you the happenings over the last 36 years. Thank you for your patience but there is so much more to come. I pray that God blesses your journey and that you draw ever so close to Him and not let circumstances dictate the next steps that you take.

For God So Loved.....

A Change of Focus..

Northfold was now becoming more and more interested in the gifting of the Spirit. Pastor Ron encouraged body ministry and had the church convinced that we were all a royal priesthood and that we were all called to the ministry. This was a very different approach from the professional minister as being the jack of all trades while the congregation sits and watches him do all the ministry in the church. When you think of it just in a practical sense it's very hard to imagine one man capable of being the evangelist, the prophet, the pastor, the teacher, along with hospital visitations, marriages, funerals, counseling and occaisonally taking out the trash.

We had several folks attempting to operate in the prophetic ministry. We had times during the services where someone would speak in tongues and another would interpret. Of course, not all of these prophecies and interpretations were accurate but there was an atmosphere at Northfold that encouraged folks to hear from God and minister what they were hearing. This seem to keep Pastor Ron very busy because folks were often looking to Him for encouragement as well as correction. Now that I look back, that was a very unique experience. It was risky business allowing people to spread their wings and fly into the realm of spritual gifts but it was also rewarding to see them grow in this area.

I have to admit that my role at Northfold seemed a bit fuzzy sometimes. My heart after coming to the Lord was to see others come to know Him. I had seen plenty of miracles while in West Virginia. The Lord had given us words of wisdom and an incredible passion but during this time at Northfold I began to think that maybe I needed to broaden my understanding of the scriptures and find a path that most ministers take that go to Bible school and Seminary and so I found a rather in depth correspondence training course from Christian International out of Texas. I started taking courses and spent a lot of time studying.

This was a major change of focus for me. I began a quest for knowledge. It was my first big step away from my dependency on the Lord. I'm not sure that this would have had the same affect on other folks but for me I found myself trying to "improve" as if I wasn't prepared for the arena that I found myself. I don't think that I understood what was happening to me at the time but my focus had gradually changed to a more horizontal view because I was so caught up in what the church needed. A dullness began to settle in and sometimes I wondered if I really belonged. Something was missing and I didn't know what.

Next up.....

I'm Accused..